Friends! Do you hear that far-off tinkling of jingle bells and the sound of children wailing as they sit on Santa’s lap at the mall?

Admission: The term “Mini Me,” when used to describe one’s child, is a bit squirm-inducing to me.

Micellar water pretty much changed the way I do my makeup. It allows me to fix my mistakes so easily, so I’m not scared to try new looks. (Who wants to go back to the starting line when you’re crafting a smoky eye? Not this chick.)

There are many points in motherhood when we share our stories. And boy are there stories to share.

Ten Things to Tell Your Kids When You Don’t Want Them Touching Any More of that Freakin’ Halloween Candy

May I just say, for the record, that my body has just about had it. It’s been a long five years of baking, birthing and nursing babies.

Any new parent can get a little anxious when a flight is on the horizon. Vacations are great, but actually getting to your destination with babies and toddlers in tow? As a great man once wrote, Therein lies the rub.

It’s been a little while since we talked about working here…I’m talking about working a job. An out-of-the-house, insurance-providing, answering-to-an-actual-human-boss kind of job. (And not toddler humans. Adult humans.)

It clearly wasn’t enough for me to cut my wardrobe effectively in half, purge tons of my kids’ toys and basically tried to Kondo-fy my entire existence… Now, I’m targeting my real problem zone.

It always starts as a little redness around my nose. Little red dots. A cluster of itchy spots.