Hello, class! Today, we are talking about vaginas.

During a naptime Facebook scroll, I came across this article in The Inquisitr, and I nearly threw the glass baby bottle I was holding against the wall.

There’s not much during pregnancy that’s more fun than dressing up, putting on some makeup and playing glam. Just kidding. Everything sounds more fun than that when you’re pregnant.

Another day, another study proving what mothers have been trying to explain for millennia with our exhaustion-limited vocabulary and sleep-deprived cortices.

It sounds like I’m far along–and looks like it too–but then I realize I have 16 weeks left and think, “Nope, lady. You’ve got some more baby hauling to do.”

Pregnancy is an amazing, but strange, time. Your body is growing, your mind and memory is starting to slip away (hiya, Mom Brain!), and you can’t fit into your damn clothes anymore, and yet everything you see in maternity clothing stores seems to be absurdly expensive or just not your style.

I’ve heard it from my pregnant friends time and time again. “All people ever want to tell me is their horror stories about giving birth. I don’t wanna hear that crap!” “Why are all these moms being so negative?!”

Of all the things I’ve gained from motherhood, the one thing I’ve lost the most of is time.

There are some things that you are forced to become more aware of, working as an anchor and reporter in television news for 13 years. Take, for example, the daily political talking points, or the latest health news, or the weather. About all of these points, most television journalists could intelligently banter.

She barely missed my eye.